The Sex of a Computer
A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
‘House ‘ for instance, is feminine: ‘ la casa. ‘
‘ Pencil, ‘ however, is masculine: ‘ el lapiz. ‘
A student asked, ‘ What gender is ‘ computer ‘ ? ‘
Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer ‘ should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.
The men ‘ s group decided that ‘ computer ‘ should definitely be of the feminine gender ( ‘ la computadora ‘ ), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
(THIS GETS BETTER!)
The women ‘ s group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ( ‘el computador ‘ ), because:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can ‘ t think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
The women won.
The Original Computer!!!!
Memory was something you lost with age
An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano
A web was a spider ‘ s home
A virus was the flu
A CD was a bank account
A hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And if you had a 3.5 inch floppy.
You just hoped nobody ever found out!?!